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Krampus

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KrampusOn Santa’s List Day, we suggested that children who learn the list of who’s naughty and nice has been finalized might be tempted to misbehave in the remaining days before Christmas, with no fear of reprisal. Krampus, today’s holiday, should thoroughly dispel that notion.

Krampus may have originated as a pagan figure in Europe’s Alpine regions, becoming associated with St. Nicholas in the 17th century. The word Krampus derives from the Old High German word for “claw” (Krampen). He is a goat-headed devil with fangs, a pointed tongue, and two cloven hooves or one hoof and one human foot.

Unlike the Santa Claus of North American tradition, St. Nicholas pays attention only to good children. He brings Krampus along on his rounds to deal with little miscreants for whom receiving a lump of coal is the least of their worries. He carries chains, birch branches, or a whip to mete out punishment and sometimes a sack or basket to capture bad children so he can drown them, eat them, or deliver them to Hell.

Europeans have been exchanging greeting cards featuring Krampus for two centuries. Greetings from Krampus (Gruß vom Krampus) cards feature humorous verse and depict the devil looming over children or pursuing buxom women. Modern cards tend to have a cuter, less menacing version of Krampus.

Although its tastefulness and propriety have been questioned over the past century, the holiday’s popularity has grown; celebrations have cropped up across North America, including Toronto, Dallas, Philadelphia, and Washington, DC. We assume that the successful completion of chores has skyrocketed in those towns.

Happy Krampus!

Santa’s List Day

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Santa's List DayToday is Santa’s List Day. According to legend, it’s the day when Kris Kringle finalizes his list, double-checks it for accuracy, and puts the elves to work manufacturing gifts for children who’ve toed the line of acceptable behavior within their age groups.

Times have changed at the North Pole. Nowadays, many parents and mental health specialists view “naughtiness” as a label that is damaging to a child’s self-esteem. As a result, elves must crank out even more toys as lumps of coal gather dust in a nearby warehouse. (Santa’s workshop runs on solar power.)

Even the most well-behaved child might take the news that Santa has locked in his list as a sign that anything goes for the next three weeks. It’s a risky move; although Santa has refused to grant journalists access, it’s quite possible that he employs tech-savvy elves who scan social media and halt the assembly line in cases of egregious misconduct.

There’s no way to know if workers are capable of making the latest Xbox. Unlike most sweatshop labor forces, elves have 11 months of the year to learn to make new things. Hopefully, they get a little time to relax and sip a mai tai at a resort that caters to diminutive people. (Keebler Beach, perhaps?)

If the workshop sources more complex items from Amazon, as everyone else does, the turnaround time is shortened and, theoretically, bad behavior can be punished on short notice. In the age of Amazon Prime’s free shipping service, will Santa shut down operations and put the reindeer out to pasture?

With Arctic ice melting at an alarming rate, it won’t be long before elves implement a Kickstarter campaign to buy a houseboat for Santa. Just for today, kids can show their appreciation for Santa’s dedication by being good to the extent required of them. Those expecting a big item like a computer or a drone should consider holding off on melting Barbies or setting the family hamster on fire until December 26th.

Happy Santa’s List Day!

#buyahouseboatforSanta

Make a Gift Day

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Today is Make a Gift Day. The holidays are nearly here; time is running out. Save your cash and make something by hand. It’s fun to do, and a homemade gift will mean much more to your loved ones than something you buy in a store.

Here are seven ideas to get you started. (And be sure to make enough to keep some for yourself!)

  1. Peppermint Coconut Soap
  2. Coffee Sugar Scrub
  3. Upcycled Jewelry Magnets
  4. All-Purpose Spice Rub
  5. Flavored and Colored Sugar
  6. Punk Rock Cookie Jar Mix
  7. Lavender Bath Bombs

Or write a poem: it doesn’t have to be good.

Happy Make a Gift Day!

Pins and Needles Day

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Pins and Needles DayToday is Pins and Needles Day, but it has nothing to do with anxiety, diabetic neuropathy, or the creepy sensation you get after sleeping all night on your arm. On November 27, 1937, musical revue Pins and Needles opened on Broadway in New York City.

Comprised of skits lampooning fascist dictators and their sympathizers, bigoted Daughters of the American Revolution, anti-labor groups, and advertising agencies, among many others, the play was performed by members of the International Ladies’ Garment Workers’ Union, which was on strike at the time.

It became such a hit that the schedule was expanded and the players quit their day jobs to act in it full-time. New skits and songs were added periodically to keep the show topical. It closed on June 22, 1940, after 1,108 performances.

In 1962, Columbia Records released a studio recording of the show’s score to commemorate its 25th anniversary. Five songs featured newcomer Barbra Streisand. The recording was digitally restored and remastered for CD release in 1993.

A revival ran for 225 shows in 1978. London’s Cock Tavern Theater mounted a production in November and December of 2010. In 2016, New York University staged an updated production of Pins and Needles, casting students who were roughly the same age as the original performers had been.

This play, which first entertained audiences in 1937, has come back many times, perhaps to remind us of the enduring spirit of satire and its important role in society. We’re certainly reminded that its themes remain topical. Have a fun-filled and happy Pins and Needles Day!